Saturday, May 1, 2010

Life with the Works, please !

We just got back from a friend's place for lunch. After we ate the great assortment of things she served, we talked for a bit about things that have been affecting us over the last while.


Her son and she have 'separated' on very bitter terms. He has been on his own for the past few months. He had been acting out very badly and was treating her very meanly. This is a young fellow (19 years) who apparently had everything going for him. Obviously not. It is ripping her apart emotionally. I am sure it is doing the same to him.


I would find something like this devastating. I cannot imagine what it would feel like to 'lose' your child  in this manner. Yes, he is alive and so far supporting himself, but what a slap in the face for both of them. Knowing him for over ten years, I did not see this coming. Either did she.


She asked how I was doing. I told her that things are so much better now.


I had a severe concussion two years ago. Actually, we were at her home at the lake......and skating. It had been a long while since I had skated and we planned to reacquaint ourselves with the whole process. And her son was helping us out. He is a good hockey player.


Things were going much better than I had anticipated. But I was still having difficulty stopping. Don't say it! So, the son and I were standing on the ice and he was explaining the whole 'stopping technique' to me. That was it. In a split second I flew straight back onto my head. Being over six feet tall, that proved to be a very high height from which to fall.


I laid on the ice, fully conscious, till I regained the feelings of my arms again. Then we all went into the house to see how things would go. Well, within the hour I knew things had changed. Can't really describe the feeling, other than my awareness of reality was pretty askew.


So Ron decided, and I agreed, to take me to emergency. When we got there I knew things were not good. Without getting into all the details, the medical staff made sure that my 'vitals' were somewhat normal before they let me leave. We got home in the middle of the night sometime.


The only reason I got into this mishap, I guess, was to get the point across that we do not know how life will unfold for us from one moment to the next. Luckily for me, I knew that eventually I would heal to some degree. But our friend does not know what will become of her relationship with her son.


Why do things like this happen? Is it life and we had better learn to accept what it throws at us? 


My sister gave me sage advice soon after my accident: "Jim, things happen for a reason". Over the past two years I have learned a lot from that statement.


My friend is also trying her to find the reason for the dilemma in which she finds herself. I know she will.

1 comment:

  1. My sympathies to your friend. I know a similar pain.
    The transition from child to adult is a tricky one for both the child and the parents. He makes his own decisions now, and she is neither at fault nor responsible for his choices. I hope that in 5 or 10 years things will be much better between them.

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